Gingerly Lizzy


The UNTAMING of the SHREW!
2001-10-25 - 10:19 a.m.

Wow, Work was kicking my BUTT yesterday! I didn't even get time to get an entry in here... that's the way... uh huh... I like it! Oh and I did that new name thing and so I guess my name is now "Über-Queen of The Louvre, Snoop Doggy Liz" hunh. Mister, I think I'm going to be able to save you ten thousand dollars.

Okay, so in 2000, I was dating this guy named Jimmy. I REALLY liked him. BUT, I didn't trust him. Can any sistas relate here?

Anyway, at the time I was living in this little student apartment and the girl in the room beside mine was named Sally. We were tight. Like really good friends... like BEST friends.

Of course there was always the fact that I hated her because she was disgustingly beautiful... no, okay, I am not THAT petty and jealous. I NEVER want to be one of THOSE people (you know, the kind that despises happier, prettier, smarter, blonder people- gimme a break, that is like a different form of racism)

But she was really pretty. So, she had introduced me to Jimmy, and we had been dating for some time. This was after he assured me that he and SAL had NEVER had any kind of relationship besides being good friends.

Well good ol' Jimmy-o starts getting totally serious on me, he doesn't want me to date anyone else. BUT... I refused to get into a relationship with anyone who I didn't trust enough to taste my food first.

SO, I tell him NO. and he is MAD. We say that we are going to take a little break. Some break. We went out the next night... and the next... but according to him, I guess we were still on a BREAK... BECAUSE...

HE MADE OUT WITH SALLY!!! Oh, when I found out I was soooo upset. I am talking whining and wailing and nashing of teeth.

Not about him mind you. I expected it from him. After all, he is male, and well 'nough said. BUT her...

ooooh that hurt. I was so ANGRY and SAD. I couldn't believe that she would do something like that to me. Not only had they lied to me and they HAD made out a few times before I met him, but they did once and actually called me to say hi at work afterwards.

That is so slimy. That is low. Think slimy, smelly earthworm low.

Eventually I forgave her, and he stopped calling after the 101 time I hung up on him.

But forgetting is a different story. I haven't forgotten.

Soooo, a month and a half ago, Dave and I were registering in Bed, Bath and Beyond and who do I see in mid training... HER.

My heart started beating faster, my mouth suddenly got dry, and a fake little smile came upon my face but inside I was in utter terror.

I gripped David's hand tighter, "that is Sally" I muttered without moving my lips...

"who?"

"Sally"

"who is Sally?" -not even trying to be descrete

"the girl... you know, cheater, skank, Jimmy... made out behind my back, she is right over there..."

"Oh, that Sally, where?" he looks around.

I had the urge to jerk his head back and scream, don't do it, don't look into her eyes, she will trap you with her sultry eyes, you will find yourself captive and I will lose you forever..."

But I didn't. I DID however, want to get out of there faster than an allergy in a beehive. So we left.

"She isn't THAT pretty" Dave said.

Oh GOSH, How I love that man.

So now we are married. I am sure without a doubt that Dave loves me more than life and would never pull a "Jimmy" on me.

So, I suggested that we go look in Bed, Bath and Beyond the other night. After all, I haven't see her in a year and half, and we WERE really close.

Sure she looks better than I do. I have accepted that... BUT...

I am wearing the ring. And my husband is DANG HOT.

Eat your heart out SINGLE Sally.

She wasn't there... DARN!!!

I should just get a frequent buyer card... that would give me an excuse.

But then again, she could never hold a job either.

Dizzy-BITTER-Lizzy

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