Gingerly Lizzy

2002-01-16 - 3:45 p.m.

Yeah so this is my second entry today but I am a little worried... I need to vent.

I just got back from my doctors appointment and it turns out I have a thing... yes a thing. Ahhhhh the wonders of modern medicine.

They tried to get me to pee in a cup when I first got there but I went before I left so that wasn't going to happen anytime soon.

"thanks for sharing Liz"

You are welcome. I thought you might like to know.

So, I tell him my symptoms. An ache. In the left lower, lower abdomen region... right HERE and I show him. So I lie on the table and he pokes me and prodes and can't feel anything. So I get to go into the x-ray room and lie on the cold table.

"Are you pregnant?" the radiologist asks...

I sure hope not, otherwise I am gonna have a three headed kid now aren't I!

"I don't think so" is my real reply.

So after the x-ray, I go back into the nice pastel colored room with a picture of a woman in her nighty and a winter coat feeding the barn yard animals in the falling snow and I wait... and wait... what a nice picture. Must have been expensive. Nice frame too...

And then I hear the doctor. And the nurse. They are talking outside the door and I can catch a word here and there and I know they are talking about me. They are talking for a long time. For what seems like forever.

I was hoping that he was gonna come back and say I was delusional but this definately points to the non-delusional type of problem.

I start getting nervous and bite my lips and clench my fingers together. "please don't let it be colitis" I say to myslef. My grandpa has it, so does my cousin. I know it is a disease that mostly men get but I know a woman who had it once and it would be just my luck. I really don't want to *you know* in a bag.

The doctor comes in. I like my doctor. He is a nice doctor. But I don't like what comes out of his mouth first.

Him: "Well, you have a thing"

Me: "A thing?"

Him: "A thing. And to tell you the truth I have never seen anything like it..."

Me: (thinking) thats right I am a freak. Step right up folks for a nickel you can see the funny lady with the thing...

Him: "I am not sure what it is yet... it could be a number of things... a calcium deposit"

Me: (thinking) a life threatening tumor...

Him: "a cyst; although it doesn't look much like a cyst... and we put you in the clear for that on our last visit... Anyway, I am not sure what it is attached to, if it is attached to anything. Do you want to see it?"

Me: (thinking) Damn right I do. "sure"

We walk out and there it is. My thing. Small and white. About the size of the tip of my baby finger although that looks kind of big to be there... he points out that it has kind of a tail on it. It looks like a tadpole, or something else if you are a little more perverted.

I am a little worried now... it is very bright on that screen in comparison to everything else.

Him: "Oh and were you aware that you broke your tailbone?"

Me: ummmmmmm.... no. It is broken?

Him: Yeah. See?

He shows me the little part of my spine that should be sticking straight down but is now pointed out to the left. At like a 90 degree angle. OH that is just great. I told him it must have been from the snowboarding fall I took. It was hard. I was a little sore but not broken bone sore.


He told me it shouldn't really matter, it might add a little more pain during childbirth. GREAT! Like it won't be painful enough.

SO, he is going to have the radiologist take a look at it and then we will go from there. Ultrasounds maybe, CAT scan... we will see. He said he would call Friday or Monday.

So I left the office with my THING and my broken tailbone and went back to work and here I am.

I am not too freaked out or anything. Just a little worried. I wish I knew what it was. I think that is the worst part is wondering. And it doesn't help that I have such a vivid imagination.

This just hasn't been my week.

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