Gingerly Lizzy

2003-04-08 - 9:02 a.m.

Still haven't heard back from anyone from the big hospital. I left a message and called several more times to register for their prenatal classes. UG! By the time someone gets back to me, all of their classes will be full too!

Afterwork yesterday, I sat outside in the sun and watched Dave and his brother play basketball. Those too are SO competitive on the court (and off for that matter), they always seem to get in a fight. But yesterday, it ended well and we treated Adam to ice cream at the Dairy Queen.

I had a bit of a sob fest last night. Something set me off and I couldn't stop. It was baby shower matters to tell you the truth. Ang, my nanny friend is throwing one for me and Lan this Sat. with some of the other nannies that we knew from out sweet of her considering I never see the girl! But that is Ang!

I was also hoping that my mother-in-law would offer, to throw one for family, and my other friends, or one of Daves sisters or something, especially since they know that my mother is 3000 miles away and unable to do it. And they know I have a hard enough time with that already.

So far, no one has said anything. I feel like if I want one to happen, I am going to have to ask for it.

I know that she is busy and pre-occupied with her daughter coming home after being on a mission for two years in Omaha, and busy with the restaurant.

I guess it just hurts my feelings. I know if I was at home, my friends would throw me a big ol' bash, and they would all be there, my mother and grandmother would throw me one, for family friends and family.

And it isn't so much the stuff I would get (although that would help too) it is the thought that they care enough about me to do that... because I would do it for them in a heartbeat.

Remember my wedding shower? (One of the first few entries I wrote). I feel like I pratically had to ask for that and then out of 13 friends I invited, two came. That was hurtful to me to, even though I made light of it in my entry.

And I know I sound like an ungrateful, big-whiney-baby. But I am also hormonal, and this is my first baby and I want some CELEBRATION darn it! It is the most exciting thing that has ever happened to me and it would be nice if my family and friends could share in it!

Sometimes I just feel so alone in all of this. My friends and family who have been with me since my beginnings are all so far away... and I just never pictured having to go through all of this without them.

I guess it is worth it to have Dave. But it's still hard.

Dave came into the room asking what was wrong, and managed to comfort me with his soothing words and cuddles. He is my everything, that man.

Tonight is my massage, and let me tell you, I am excited! I am going to tell her to dig her elbows in and fix this spastic muscle no matter how hard she has to knead!

Question for all your mommies out there... Is it normal to be less than seven months pregnant and have the baby's kicks already hurt so much?

I will be seven months on the 22nd. Which is still like two weeks away. It seems like he should still be tiny enough that it shouldn't hurt this much when he pushes out? It isn't so much the kicks as it is his stretching my tummy out with little arms and legs. It is like he is testing the limits to see just how far he can go! And it really feels sore inside!

Is this normal or do I have a little he-man in there or is my uterus or tummy lining supersensitive?

I am thinking I am in big trouble in a month or so!

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