Gingerly Lizzy

An entry from my journal tonight.
2007-01-18 - 11:35 p.m.

Dearest Sydney,
Tonight I just have to write to you, to tell you how much I love you at this very moment! You just came walking out of your room, a sleepy, smiley two year old with a little bob haircut and blue fleece pajamas. You stood in your doorway until I came over and you said "hi mum". I picked you up and you wrapped your arms and legs around me and snuggled into that space between my shoulder and neck. You looked so beautiful with your "just woken", rosy cheeks and your ever red, bow shaped lips that both daddy and I can never resist kissing. I said "my pretty baby" and strained my neck back so I could see your face. You gave me a coy little look and when I asked you to "show me your pretty face" you broke out into a funny little smile that melted my heart and made me hug you tighter. I rocked you for a moment in my arms until you pointed at your little crib mattress laid on the floor beside our bed (the one you climb into, in the middle of every night without fail). I gently laid you down on it and watched you for a few minutes. You took your little pointer finger and gently scratched your nail along your soft cheek over and over; the way you always do when you are sleepy or thoughtful. I laid my head lightly on your shoulder, breathed in the sweet smell that is yours and just felt happy. You said something about "a princess" (the only thing you talk about these days are ballerinas and princesses). I gave you what must have seemed like a thousand gentle kisses on your little lips, soft cheek and neck and thought that I would get out this journal that I neglect so badly and write about you.

Why? Because you need to know someday how much this one simple moment meant to me. How blessed I feel to have such a beautiful little girl as my daughter. How completely happy one hug or look from you can make me.
You need to know that I cherish all of these moments. That both your father and I just wish we could freeze time and keep you just like this, forever and how it breaks our hearts to think of you ever growing up.

You area a funny and girly. Sweet and yet so sure of yourself and what you want, (or who you decide you don't like!). I love the way you prance around the house in your "princess dresses" and pink play high heels with the marabou feathers (you love the clicking sound they make on the hardwood floor). I love the way you tell Blake "I'm cwabby" when you have just woken up from your nap and want him to leave you alone. I love it when you tell me, "mommy you so funny!", or how easily you say you're sorry, even when you've done nothing wrong.
You are such a precious spirit and I feel like the luckiest woman ever, because I know you. I knew from the first moment I held you in my arms that I would be madly in love with you my whole life. And even though I know it is inevitable, I can only hope that you never change. You are perfect at this very moment.
I love you my sissy...


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